This is 40

I'm not sure how I'm "supposed" to feel. But I can tell you I'm happy the build up is over. Every time I was asked how old I was over the last year, I was greeted with raised eye brows and a remark similar to, "ohhh the big birthday is coming!" Thank you? I mean come on, it wasn't going to hurt, it was just a day where you get 300 some facebook notifications of well wishes, eat something frosted, open texts from close friends and surround yourself with some of your favorite people and things. Heck, give me all the birthdays!  My grandfather once quipped, "Its better to have birthdays than to not have birthdays!". Touche.

But because it was a "big brithday" which in true honesty I have lovingly refereed to as the new f-word in the house, Nathan and I did make some goals to celebrate us both turning 40 this year. We decided to celebrate the f-word with a more fun f-word....FURNITURE. Goodness you are probably going to stop reading right now, right? Like how boring are we, I knowwwww. But folks when we adopted Macee, that jumped up our plans to update and remodel our sweet 70's ranch by two years. So we are now on the fast track to getting this love nest ready to rock for a the greatest graduation reception ever in May and since turning off all the lights and kicking on strobe lights is only popular in da club- we've got to get moving.  Also any smart women knows, new furniture leads to new rugs, new paint, new pillows, new light fixtures and new art. My sweet husband had no idea what he was getting himself into cuz I got all that AND new flooring and made him take down a wall and I feel zero percent bad about it.

Year 39 was a year where I constantly questioned where I was and where I was going and really wrestled with some big kid questions, I sat out to make a plan to help me find my way. In this blog you can click on CHEAT CODES and read about my meetings with mentors. I asked for advice from people wiser, more successful and often older than me.  They have the cheat codes, they've been where I was. They know all the secrets and I will continue to meet with mentors and share their knowledge and success in hopes that it will become part of my story and maybe yours too.

What did I do to start feeling better about 40? Well I eventually just decided to kick my own ass and not die wondering. I had big goals I wanted to do and just needed to take things day at a time and say yes to what felt good and be more transparent and more honest than ever with myself.

Life is like waiting at a bus stop for the thing to transport you to your destination. The wait is also agonizing and exhilarating. So lets go through it together. I have